Saturday, September 16, 2006

A trip to the apple farm

This weekend was an amazing trip to the Apple Farm. Jeremy, my Mom and I drove up to Dixon's Apple Farm to pick up some apples and cider. Now I know it wasn't what Jeremy was looking forward to doing since he couldn't go and pick and apple from the tree (and we saw the trouble you get in by the big man when you do), but I was totally looking forward to it. It was the first weekend they were open and boy could you tell!! We had packed a lunch to eat at the picnic tables up there, however, once we hit the dirt road to head to the farm there was a long line of cars waiting to get in, so we ate our picnic in the car. WHAT?? WE WERE HUNGRY!!! Once we finally got up to the farm and parked, we had to wait in another line to get into the shed to pick up our bag of apples, but it was totally worth it. The minute you stepped in the apple shed you were engulfed with the sweet aroma of that was what I had waited in two lines for two hours for!! There's nothing like the distinct smell of apples to jump start your fall. We pushed our wheelbarrel through the huge shed and picked up our two bags of apples and cider. The drive back home wasn't full of excitement like the drive up to the farm was. But the whole way home we got to smell those delicious apples!!

Friday, September 08, 2006


I am currently reading an amazing book, Captivating, by John and Stasi Eldredge. It is a women's guide to her soul, and let me tell you they are right on. So far, in what I have read, they have tackled the hard issues of what women really long for and desire in their lives. They say that all women crave three things: to be romanced, adventure and to be the Beauty. Which, hello, is seriously so true.

I was reading Chapter 5 which dealt with Secret Hatred. They discussed abuse both physical and verbal and they also talked about a women's greatest fear -- abandonment. This one totally struck me hard and made me look at my life and the greatest struggles I have. Honestly, I think I can say most of my struggles and stumbling blocks I deal with in life from jealousy, trust and even my fear of the dark can be linked to this fear of abandonment. I never actually thought about it, but it makes a whole lot of sense.

I get jealous when a guy I am seeing talks highly and often of another woman because I fear he will find her more interesting than me and abandon me for her. And it's not that I would rather not hear about her, that's the farthest thing from the truth, and it actually would probably make me even more upset, but knowing this jealousy relates to my fear that he will abandon me makes me look more at the real problem of being left and how to get over it. The same thing goes for trust (although I think this one has more to do with past experiences, however, these experiences ultimately lead to me being abandoned). And as far as being scared of the dark, more than anything I'm afraid to be alone in the dark, or ABANDONED in the dark.

Growing up, I was blessed to always have my mother and father for support. Never once did I feel they had abandoned me or would abandon me; so it makes me wonder and conclude that this really is a fear of all women. And not a fear we have acquired through a hard childhood, but a real fear we are born with and as women have.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

It's begining to look a lot like fall!!

So I'm sure some people have gotten sick of me talking about the feeling of fall in the air, but it's's really starting to feel like fall to me. And let me tell you, I LOVE IT!!! The bit of a chill that is now in the air which signifies the coming of sweater and jacket weather really makes me smile. With this chill coming also comes hot chocolate and fires in the fireplace. It also makes me excited to know apple season is upon us. There is nothing like the hour drive north to the apple farm to pick up bags of apples for baking and eating, not to mention the apple cider they serve. Fall also means the time of leaves changing color and falling. What is it about something dying that in turn is so beautiful?? Summer is over, and although it was great to bask in the sun in tank tops and flip flops, I'm ready for a change. I'm ready to continue along the path of my life.